What Does it Mean to be “Nice”?

How Do You Have So Many Friends? My Oncologist asks me this question almost every time I see him: “How do you have so many friends?” He spelled out the longer version of that question, or his implied question, today by saying, “If I got sick, would I know if I’d have any friends to … Read more

Comfortable Confrontation

Comfort is not a Prerequisite Is anyone comfortable with confrontation? I don’t know. There are certainly people skilled at confronting others. But that doesn’t mean that they enjoy it or that they are comfortable. The truth is, if you are waiting to feel comfortable, then you are delaying and/or stunting the growth of important aspects … Read more

The Cultivation of Intimacy

Why I Don’t Like Talking on the Phone I was watching a drama on HBO called The Leftovers and one character said to another “I don’t know how to talk to you yet.”  They had just been on their fourth date and one had made a joke…there was some concern that the joke had offended … Read more

Uncovering the Authentic Self

Finding Ourselves Most of us spend a fair amount of our lives “finding ourselves.”  What are we really trying to find? Whether it is determining our roles in our relationships or finding our life’s purpose; to determining our vocation and contribution; to finding our spiritual or religious beliefs. So much of what shapes us is … Read more